Probably Not Coming To A Food Court Near You

Vending machines are just about everywhere and nowadays you can almost anything being dispensed by one somewhere. Soda, chips, candy, marijuana? In California at least, the answer is yes.

The World’s first “Weed ATM’s” as they are being dubbed should be available for use in LA and elsewhere in the land of fruit and nuts on Monday and each one comes with it’s own security guard to make sure there is no funny business.

AVMs are 24/7 machines housed in standalone rooms, abutting two dispensaries and protected by round-the-clock security guards — like ATMs for people combating psychological withdrawal with a physical one. After cinching up your doctor’s consultation, hit an AVM location to get your prescription approved, fingerprint taken, and a prepaid credit card loaded with your profile: dosage (3.5 or 7 grams, up to 1oz a week) and strain preference (choice of five, including OG Cush and Granddaddy Purple, the mildly hallucinogenic forebear to Prince). Then day or night, all you do is hit a machine and walk away with enough vacuum-sealed, plastic-encapsulated cheeba to adequately treat your illness, and guarantee your car never smells like new leather again.

And to think here in South Dakota we have a hard time just getting the pill.

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